Patriarchal religions are also part of the picture.
Not because we would really need them. Mankind managed without them for hundreds of thousands of years. Patriarchal religions are part of our world because they are here and because they left strong imprints on many people of our culture on a very personal level. I grew up in a Christian environment and therefore know the Christian tradition very well. I leave it to others to evaluate the effects of other monotheistic religions.
In the sphere of Christian churches in different forms, one special aspect attracted my attention working with family constellations, which provide insights into the occurences of many generations. This aspect disturbs the flow of life as well as the flow of loving in many relationships, especially couple relationships, but also in relationships between parents and children, in relationships in society plus in the relationship between humans and the world as a whole.
I am speaking of the profound devaluation of women and the feminine, which persists over thousands of years. Christian churches saw women, quite in opposition to Jesus Christ by the way, as the originators of sin, as seductresses, as a threat to the right path of men.
What was sacred in the pre-Christian matriarchal traditions of Europe, love between men and women, the joyful unification of opposites, understood as two sides of a single entity, became a sin by Christian beliefs. The female and male representatives of the ancient nature religions were demonized and burned or otherwise murdered in a genocide for centuries. Women who felt attached to the goddess and her unconditional acceptance of all nature and all life, women, who in their full dignity felt evenly matched to men as another aspect of wholeness and who met men at eye level, were demonized as being in league with the devil and killed as a hazard to Christianity. Men, who stood in the same matriarchal tradition in those times, met the same fate being accused as warlocks.
The degradation of sexuality from the sacred field into sinfulness, into the bad, the depraved and the demonic has had terrible consequences over the centuries. Thousands of “illegitimate” mothers were discriminated against, expelled from society and driven into suicide. Children born out of wedlock were despised as the fruit of sin and exposed to death by neglect or hunger in Christian monastic institutions.
Even 50 years ago it was a shame in Germany to have an “illegitimate” child.
In addition, the devaluation of sexuality including the loving physical unification in general necessarily comes with the devaluation of your own sexual, erotic and loving energies. You yourself are becoming the “sinful” being who no longer allows fulfillment in love. This is not only very impolite towards yourself, but has the consequence that the free flow of your vital energy is severely restrained also in all other areas, including professional life, creativity and your contribution to society.
Today’s Christian churches still carry the devaluation of women and of sexuality. To this day, a deep mistrust between the sexes can be observed, which is entirely based on mutuality. Because, of course, women who had to live in this insulting and disrespecting tradition for centuries were looking for revenge and found many ways to avenge themselves on men.
Still today many young people unconsciously carry the seed of this serious discord. With a fundamental devaluation of the opposite gender in the heart, no happiness can be found in a couple relationship.
Because it is exactly the mutual high respect, the fundamental knowledge of the deep bond with the partner, the knowledge that man and woman are really two aspects of the same wholeness, on par with each other in every aspect and full of love for each other and the whole world, exactly this mutual high respect creates full happiness.
To reach the state of high respect for yourself and for your partner is a big challenge. For the religious imprints that underlie the devaluation are strong and have had time for centuries to establish themselves in society and thus also in your thinking and in your unconscious attitudes.
First and foremost, a clear view of the situation helps, then a clear decision against the devaluation of the opposite gender and thus the disempowerment of the religious dogmas at all levels.
If you understand that you as a free person have your own power of judgment and the full right to find your own view of yourself and the opposite gender, you are ready for the new. Then you are ready for happiness in your relationships.
High respect is the key!
- Take fifteen minutes, no matter where you are. Look with high respect at yourself. Include your feelings, longings and happy fantasies. Highly respect every aspect of yourself, no matter what you may have thought about it so far.
- Then take another 15 minutes and look at the opposite gender with high respect. If you are a man, look with high respect at any woman you meet today. If you are a woman, look with high respect at any man you meet today.
- Now look at your partner with respect. Meet him or her at eye level.
Along the way notice what is going on in yourself .